CS Lewis once said that "grief is like the sky, it covers everything." In recent weeks, our family has found that this is so very true. It seems that there is no right or wrong way to travel this path of grief. I have created this blog in hopes that some day we will be able to look back on our journey and see written proof that our great God never leaves us. God is good all the time.

Celebrating Laynee

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Thursday, August 22, 2013

First Grade

This morning I sent my children off to their first day of school.   That is, at least, my children who are attending our home school district.  Jamee moved back to Saint Louis on Monday and Grant started his college classes the same day.  But today Jade began her senior year, Brock started as a sophomore, Moise went to 6th grade.  Even Kruz started with a new babysitter.  

The house was abuzz with activity.  We took the customary front porch pictures.  All the while, tucked away in the back of my mind was the keen, aching awareness that something was missing.  Laynee should have been here in the mix of back to school.  She should have gone to first grade.  

I think this day, this first day of school, does not get better.  It does not hurt less.  I will miss her.....always... on the first day of school.

She loved her back pack so much.  She was so proud.  This day, when this picture was taken, she refused to look at the camera.  She just wanted to look at her new back pack.  So today, like last year, I took a crisp new back pack to her grave.  Minnie Mouse this time.  I am pretty sure she would love Minnie Mouse.   I have decided that this will be a back to school tradition.  The back pack doesn't ease the pain, not even a little, but it's something that I can do for my little girl.  


1 comment:

  1. No mom, not ever, should have to take a backpack to their childs grave. Not ever.

    Love to you sweet friend. Today tomorrow and always in these unspeakably heartbreaking times.