CS Lewis once said that "grief is like the sky, it covers everything." In recent weeks, our family has found that this is so very true. It seems that there is no right or wrong way to travel this path of grief. I have created this blog in hopes that some day we will be able to look back on our journey and see written proof that our great God never leaves us. God is good all the time.

Celebrating Laynee

You might want to scroll to the bottom of this page and pause the music before playing this video.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Something Kind Of Wonderful

There's a feeling that I get sometimes that is difficult to explain. I had never experienced this in quite the same way until after I had to say good bye to my daughter. It's a feeling of experiencing great joy but aching for so much more. Tonight as I was out for my evening run down the country roads near my house, I experienced this.

  The evening sky was extraordinary. Pinks, reds, oranges and purples streaked across the sky, east and west. I never see a sunset or sunrise like this without thinking of Laynee. I imagine she is one of the master painters up there splashing all that color for us to see. But tonight it stole my breath away. The sky was so thick with color, Laynee's color. Missing her hurt so much that the familiar lump formed in my throat and tears came to my eyes. But the sky felt so close, heaven felt so close, Laynee felt so close, as though I ought to be able to reach out and touch the part of heaven that holds my daughter. The sky was so spectacular that I couldn't help feeling joyful but I ached for something so much more. I ached for Laynee, for heaven.

How wonderful, O Lord, are the works of your hands! 
The heavens declare Your glory,
 the arch of the sky displays Your handiwork


  1. Karol--I happen to be on my blog and I saw this post that you just posted yesterday.....I was meant to see this. You are not alone. I know exactly that feeling. That lump in the throat, and the smile that comes with it. The pain, the joy. The peace, the hurt. I knew the day Chase left us that we would never, EVER, see or experience flawless beauty again. And it happens when I see something so beautiful or we are doing something as a family that is really fun or fantastic. I feel that weight on my shoulders....the part that's missing from this perfect happy or beautiful moment. You photos are amazing. Words don't do them justice--I mean I would put those puppies on canvas and hang them in my house! I'm so happy you are surrounded by such beauty. It is such a perfect reminder of beautiful Laynee. Hugs to you and your sweet family. xoxo

  2. And my heart aches for you my friend.

    What is it about the sky that brings about these feelings for us. My son came in and said one day, "Grandma painted a beautiful sky for you tonight mom."

    I always look to the heavens and think of my mom. Holding Gracie. Waiting for us.

    Love to you Karol