CS Lewis once said that "grief is like the sky, it covers everything." In recent weeks, our family has found that this is so very true. It seems that there is no right or wrong way to travel this path of grief. I have created this blog in hopes that some day we will be able to look back on our journey and see written proof that our great God never leaves us. God is good all the time.

Celebrating Laynee

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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Found it

On Saturday we went to Ewing Park in Bloomington to watch Brock run in his sectional cross country meet.  He did fabulous and next week will advance to the coveted state meet, also held in Bloomington. 

Saturday was only the second time, in all of my 8 years of having runners on the cc team, that we had a meet at this particular place.  As I was walking through the parking lot, to where the race would be,  truth came like a kick in the stomach.  The only other time we had been here was with Laynee.  Two years ago Jade ran on this same course and both Moise and Jalayne were there with us.  The weather this year was almost exactly as it was that day, unseasonably warm.  I cearly recall that it was very warm as I remember peeling off layers of Laynee's clothes and leaving her in nothing but a pink and white striped onesie, socks, and her sweet tennies.  I could almost smell the sweetness of her sweaty body as I thought back. 

I remembered that I had at least one picture and I came home, determined to find the photo.  I looked through the many files, coming across many shots that I'd forgotten about.  Finally, I found it. 

The memories.........they are so sweet.   They are so painful. 

In the picture below, Laynee proudly displays one of Jade's many medals.  The scar down the center of her chest reminds me of all that we went through.  The hours of worry and fear, the countless prayers on her behalf.  She was a fighter.  I can't help looking at the scar, knowing that she was one to defy the odds stacked against her, and say "WHY?"  I just don't get it.  "WHY!!!!!!!!"

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